Last modified: January 18, 2025
Phoebe Literature| February 1, 2025| Poetry, Print Issues
My mother taught me silence like a secret handshake,
more muscle memory than vow.
When asked about her now, a hush
entangles fingers, slaps, knocks fists.
I say everything
but this. She made my body
a ghost story no one would believe.
Least of all, me. She made me open
to interpretation. Every memory
a plot hole she could prod.
She taught me to draw
so lightly nothing needs
erasing. The trick’s pretending
you intended each mistake.
She made my memory
a line break, taught me to shape
the white space, until even
silence stays unsaid. If only she’d bent
my fingers back, pressed
for a promise, I could say this much
for sure: She insisted
I harbor secrets in my stomach.
She shelves every swallowed story
under loyalty. She taught me
to write fiction
every time I sign my name.
Mary Maxfield (they/she) uses nonfiction, poetry, fiction, and research to explore queerness, healing, and community. Their past publications include Catapult, Strange Horizons, and Sweeter Voices Still: An LGBTQ Anthology from Middle America. Mary has been honored as a Lambda Literary Fellow and as a finalist in Button Poetry’s annual spoken-word contest. Find her online at marymaxfield.com.
Last modified: January 18, 2025