| Poetry, Print Issues

Birth Control

Rebecca Hawkes

 

“why suck the strap” why look at a sunset. why listen to your favourite song. why stop to smell the flowers. come on now

                –  Tumblr user @bloodpups

 

To live ethically in the present moment means finding creative strategies for living with toxicity—to accept it as a new queer future and to find ways of navigating horror while resisting the policies, governments, and corporations that would like to see our lives foreclosed.

Heather Davis, “Imperceptibility and Accumulation: Political Strategies of Plastic”

I.

Until the state sharpens its scalpels

I will remain immaculate.

Rubber talismans implanted


in the inner fascia of my bicep.

Instructions fed directly to my flesh.

Softcore cyborg so what-

ever else I might invite

inside myself

remains nobody’s business.

 

II.

I eat a brand new credit card each day,

shredded and sprinkled like sugar crystals

over probiotic yogurt.

My future lymph runs hot with pesticides;

my bisphenol A, my mouthfuls of phthalates.

Ever compromised by chemistry… now you

have asked me to stop swimming in the creek

where pale foam gathers to soft peaks

like whipped cream begging to be licked from skin.

 

III.

Why not waste these brief days

tonguing silicone?

Some faiths require supply chains

of warm bodies to inhabit. Hermit crabs

rehomed in RealDoll torsos.

My babes go unmade. Still I worship

powers of creation:

fealty sworn to fossil deaths

processed to form a hot pink cock.

Those hydrocarbon corpses rise again,

brilliant as their Precambrian sunshine.

Our endowment’s replica pearlescence

welcomed into every widening gyre.

 

IV.

Long after our bodies go, this dildo

marches among the ocean’s bright parade.

Cruising islands of stray toys and torn drag

-nets shimmy over the waves. A smorgasbord

of buoyant dross attended by turtles

draped in fishnets, and the royal albatross.

Sparkling garbage with sea dragons. Men-o-war.

Violet snails and by-the-wind sailors, all

the jellies and the fishes,

elegant insects that walk on water,

each devoted to their governing currents.

Ocean cleanup operations skim

all kinds of fragile life-forms

indiscriminately from the sea.

Washed up on the beach in record numbers,

strap-ons of all sizes

nudge each other

as though breeding.

 

V.

From below, the bottled light

beamed through the Great Pacific Garbage Patch

bestows a queer cathedral window.

Take ye now the polyethylene tag

from the bag that reseals for freshness

yer body’s broken bread. With your thumb

lay it down upon my tongue.

No need to pray. We’ve beaten death.

Our love will not decay.

We’ll shimmer microscopic

in the polar snows and tropic rains.

 

VI.

And even once our enemies

have murdered us,

the children

will inherit plastic raptures

shining true as glitter in the blood.

Rebecca Hawkes is a queer painter and poet from Aotearoa, New Zealand. Her book Meat Lovers won Best First International Collection in the UK Poet Laureate’s 2022 Laurel Prize and was a Lambda Literary Award finalist for bisexual poetry in the US. She is head shepherd of warm-blooded literary journal Sweet Mammalian and co-edited the Antipodean climate crisis anthology No Other Place to Stand. In the US, her poems have been awarded Salt Hill’s Philip Booth Poetry Prize and Palette Poetry’s Sappho Prize, with more work published or forthcoming in Glass, Hobart, Cordite, Landfall, HAD, and Gigantic Sequins. Rebecca is currently topsy-turvy between hemispheres studying an MFA in yearning (and, to a lesser extent, poetry) at the University of Michigan.

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